It is been a long time since I've posted something here. Now, thank God! I have posted another one. This is my soulish self actually, but still I have included it here at my site.
I'm just a being of love and frustrations. I think I'm lying to myself. I thought I know myself, but I really don't. I thought my life was simple as I dreamed, but it's not.I don't know how I will find my self again. I know I've did it years ago. I became careless of it and scattered it to the sandy earth. How will I ever put it back to it's original shape? Can I still pick up the pieces of mixed broken glass, thistle thorns and torn papers? Can I still have the courage to be wounded by the truth? How can I mend it and solve the puzzle of my life?
I still don't have the answers. I don't know how, why, what where, who, or can I. It is still BLANK. BLACK. EMPTY. I can't answer myself. No one can answer me, not even myself. It is like floating in the depths of the abyss. I don't know where to start and where to end. Nobody's there. Just me- only me.
I can't blame fate or destiny or even God for this. It is my fault. You can call me emotional, sensitive, insane or better be irresponsible. I deserve it. It is I who put myself in htis case- in this situation. And now, I don't know... no idea of regaining my whole self. Trials come. Antagonists kept on giving me reason to give up. Enemies stole every thing from me. I still have something- the thing to reflect and to decide. I must choose whether I will pursue picking up my self though it will cost me time or end this sufferings and suffer again in the other world. Still, I'm not stupid. I still recognize the sunlight behind the mountain.
Thank you paper. I still have something. I realized it. I am a soul, but not just a soul.
*note: this is first posted at semaj-lien.weebly.com
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